Recalling his first day on the job, one current executive said, "I didn't mind finding my name printed on the door with chalk, but I was quite disturbed by the wet sponge hanging on the doorknob."
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De BOSS ain't always right... but he is always de BOSS!
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Please be patient. I only work here because I am too old for a paper route, too young for social security and too tired to have an affair.
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God put me on Earth to accomplish a certain number of things. Right now, I am so far behind that I shall never die
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PSALM OF A POSTAL WORKER
A terror is my boss,
I hall not slack off.
He throweth my cigarettes in the trashcan,
He taketh away my holidays,
He loadeth me down with piled-up work.
He leadeth me to the main office to be disciplined
For the sake of his sanity.
Yea, even tho' I walk thru the office
In the shadow of suspicions,
I fear great evil;
For I have forgotten to sign in.
Thy face and thy staff
They do not comfort me...
Thou ignoreth me with thine words,
In the presence of my supervisors
Thou annointest my head with formal counsels.
My eyes runneth over.
Surely hard work and mistreatment shall follow me
In all the days of my life
And I shall dwell in the house of labor forever.
Amen, special delivery.
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For several years now, I've been blaming it on middle age, poor blood, lack of vitamins, air pollution, saccharin, obesity, dieting, underarm odour, yellowy wax buildup and another dozen maladies that make you wonder if life is really worth living.
But I have found out that these are not the reasons!
I'm tired because I'm overworked.
The population of this country is 27 million. Of these, 11 million are retired. That leaves 16 million to do all the work.
Six million are in school, so that leaves ten million to do all the work.
Two million are unemployed, while four million are employed by the government. That leaves 4 million to do all the work.
One million are in the armed forces. Two million are employed by municipalities and country councils. That leave one million to do all the work.
There are 620,000 people in hospitals and 379,998 people in prisons. That leaves two people to do all the work.
YOU and ME. And you are sitting on your ass reading this.
No wonder I'm so tired!
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What are the similarities between the boss and a diaper?
- They are always hanging around your ass.
- Then are both full of shit.
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